Honestly

So here I sit...3 days overdue. I was convinced baby would be here by now, that I'd be holding her in my arms, smelling her, nursing her, unable to keep my eyes off her...but not yet.

I keep checking my emotional status, so many moms are DONE at this point in pregnancy, and I have to keep asking myself why I don't feel that way...

...Maybe it's because I'm not physically miserable or even uncomfortable for that matter. I have no discomforts to speak of, and am actually still truly enjoying being pregnant.

...Maybe it's because this miracle is so great that I'm just thankful for every day I get to feel life growing inside me.

...Maybe it's because I feel this is my last experience with pregnancy and I'm just trying to soak it all up...every last minute.

...Maybe it's because I realize it is out of my hands and completely in God's. Giving it to Him is certainly easier than wondering/worrying about it myself....thinking my actions can change His plan is foolish.

Now, yes, of course my mind has moments where I grow crazy with anticipation. But these moments are checked with the reality of one of the above points. I am crazy about this new addition to our family, but I am at peace just waiting for her...in her own time...and according to God's ultimate plan. Honestly.